gorysortofstory | Yennefer Open Post

Wordlessly, Ciri nods. Suffocated is only part of it, but it's the safest word to choose from. Or, at least, it feels like it is. Acknowledging the frustration more directly feels too close to acknowledging the helplessness any more than she already has not because of a fear of it being exploited—even with lingering mistrust, she doesn't think Yennefer would do that—but because acknowledging it only makes it burn and sting and itch all the worse beneath her skin.

"He's almost written back to you." The princess looks to Yennefer. She knows she shouldn't meddle. Geralt hasn't when it comes to Ciri's relationship with Yennefer aside from his hovering about. But she's already somewhat done that in pointing it out to Geralt earlier as part of her argument. If he's wanting to talk to Yennefer, then that has to be a sign they can be given a bit more space, doesn't it? Geralt hadn't agreed. Or rather, he hadn't said anything to that point. Just her name said in that tone that told her she was speaking out of turn mingled with the sort of exhaustion that has to come from all this division between the two people meant to protect, teach, and guide her. "A couple of times, actually."

It's possible Yennefer will say the same as Geralt with more words (or even the same amount), but it's also possible not.

There's a tightness in her chest that Yennefer chooses to ignore at the young girl's words. Of course she has hoped Geralt would write back to her, she would not keep writing to him without some hope of breaking down those damn walls of his, but that's hardly the main reason she does it. She really does want to gain his trust again, and reporting what she's doing and Ciri's progress seems like a good way to begin to do that.

"He'll write back when he's ready."

And not a minute sooner. Geralt is as stubborn as she is.

"You shouldn't have to keep track of that." Ciri has enough to worry about without adding the division between her two guardians to the list.

"What else do I have to do?"

It's not as though she can train all day. At some point, she has to put her blade down and there's only so much energy (or frustration) for her magic lessons before those also must come to an end. And after all that, she's not left with much. She does a few chores here and there—those that Geralt trusts her to do because, frankly, being a princess doesn't lend itself well to knowing how to do those things terribly well—and then... There's really not much else to fill her time with. She can't go to the nearest village and hang about the market, hoping for a bit of conversation or even playing with some of the children younger than her. She can't go wandering off into the wilderness on her own whether because of monster or man.

She gets bored.

"Besides," she says, lifting her chin in that way only a precocious child would ever do. "It's not as though the two of you are subtle about it."

...There might also be a few orens riding on when the two of them finally push past everything with one another with the bard. Ciri will never tell. But they do stare at one another longingly often enough that what? Ciri is supposed to just shut her eyes and pretend she doesn't see it?

If it was anyone else she would be annoyed at the sureness of Ciri's words -- actually she's still annoyed but Ciri gets away with a lot that other people would not -- would get the sharpness of her tongue. Even if she knows there is truth in it. She can feel Geralt's eyes on her sometimes, watching her for reasons that go beyond mistrust and paranoia.

Sometimes she wants to push that, to force herself back in whether he likes it or not. Soon enough, she will.

"No," She admits with a small chuckle, a rare sound these days. "I suppose for all the things we have been, subtle has never been one of them."

"No, not really," Ciri says with a shake of her head, eyebrows raising as she thinks almost immediately of the awkward way in which she met Yennefer. Dear friend was how Geralt described her to Ciri and she to this day doesn't know if that clumsy explanation made it better or worse that she had walked in on them locked in a kiss. "But maybe that's the problem. You're both trying to be subtle."

Yennefer with her letters. Geralt with his staring.

"I'm giving him his space, there's a difference."

Her words are slightly defensive, and not entirely true. Some of it is protection of herself. She can hear his thoughts, she knows he's not close to forgiving her yet but it would hurt even more to hear it spoken out loud again. Still, eventually she'll grow tired of waiting on invitiations.

That time just hasn't come yet.

Even in the absence of Yennefer responding as harshly as she could, the defensiveness isn't anything that Ciri needs spelled out for her. She's been around Yennefer enough that she knows when she's beginning to push the limits. In that regard, she thinks, Geralt and Yennefer quite similar. Yennefer just uses more words typically to signal that she's beginning to tread into potentially difficult territory. Geralt tends to lean upon a particular stern look and if needs must, he says her name with a tone to match it. However, unlike Geralt, Ciri doesn't dare press upon matters with Yennefer. Not that Ciri would ever admit it openly, but she doesn't feel entirely comfortable doing as much with Yennefer. It doesn't feel dangerous, but... It still feels far too soon for something like that.

She lets the topic drop.

Bracing herself with her hands behind her, Ciri lifts herself up to sit more properly on the rock, crossing her legs as she does.

"I should have brought the cards outside."

Not that Ciri knew it wouldn't have just been her and the horses out here. But she and Yennefer could at least pass the time a little while with something that wasn't reliant upon talking. (Which didn't necessarily feel wrong or alien to do with Yennefer, but... Without it being focused upon her lessons or simple tasks about the property with Geralt in easy earshot, it felt different.) And Yennefer would hopefully make for a better opponent than Jaskier. Despite the bard's protests to the contrary, she doesn't think he was letting her win. Not after a certain point, anyway. Once she fully understood the rules and started adopting a bit of strategy.

There's something defeating in the way the girl gives up on pushing her -- though all things considered, she can't blame Ciri. She's not blind to the way it's easier for her to push Geralt -- there is a trust there that they haven't formed yet, that is taking much more time considering Yennefer's own actions and betrayals.

"I can help with that," Yennefer says with a mischievous smile. She whispers in Elder, moving her hands together as she conjures a set with her magic. If she has magic back, she might as well use it to bring some joy into their lives.

Or at least less awkward silence.

"I'll warn you though, I'm not as easily swindled as the bard."

Once Yennefer conjures up the deck, Ciri reflects back a grin herself. She scoots over on the rock to make room for Yennefer and the cards.

"We'll see about that," she says, lifting her chin. "You shouldn't underestimate me just because I haven't been playing for as long."

"You weren't the one I was insulting there."

Yes, she likes to poke fun at Jaskier even when he's not around. It's her love language. More seriously though, she does not underestimate Ciri -- nor would she insult her by letting her win either.

She holds the deck out to the girl, a silent offer to let her shuffle.

Ciri's not quite as practiced at shuffling, usually deferring to Jaskier for the task, especially given his penchant for a little flair with some fun little card tricks to go along with it.

"I know," Ciri says with a grin. "But it's not as funny when he's not here to start sputtering at you about it."

Yennefer isn't the only person who gives Jaskier grief it would seem.

All the more reason to give her a chance to practice it.

"No, it's not nearly as fun, is it?"

She's seen the comfortable way Ciri ribs at the bard. It's good that she can have that normalcy with someone. He has things he can give that she and Geralt cannot.

"Mm," Ciri says with a shake of her head in agreement. She takes the offered deck and begins shuffling. After a moment, she admits, "I wish he could have stayed."

She knows why he couldn't, of course. He was not only expected back at Oxenfurt, but he was able to help better there than out in the middle of nowhere with the three of them. He could keep an eye on gossip and rumors, and plant the seeds of some of his own if needed to give them a little bit of respite. She also doesn't think Geralt liked the idea of dragging the bard around in the thick of danger like this either. Not when he had so few ways of defending himself relative to the rest of them.

Ciri suspects Yennefer agreed with that, too. Especially since she found herself in agreement.

She doesn't want anyone else dying for her.

But that doesn't mean she doesn't still miss having another familiar face around. Or how much less the tension between Yennefer and Geralt seemed to be with him around.

Ciri begins to deal the hands between her and Yennefer.

"We'll see him again," She promises. She wishes Jaskier could have stayed as well, but she doesn't say it for a multitude of reasons, not least of all not wanting to burden Ciri with her own feelings.

But she misses having someone around who forgave her rather quickly and trusted her with his life (to be fair, she did save it). She knows it'll be harder with Ciri and Geralt, especially Geralt as he's made his feelings known in no uncertain terms, but it should be.

Still.

It had been nice to have someone who wasn't expecting her to betray them if they took their eyes off her.

She takes her hand from Ciri, assessing her hand carefully as she does so.

"We had better," Ciri says to Yennefer's promise. It's as reasonable as Yennefer can likely make to her here and now. Anything more like a promise they wouldn't have to run anymore or that some semblance of a normal life could manifest itself sooner or later would be a lie. A sweet lie, but a lie nonetheless.

Ciri sets the remainder of the deck down before gathering up her own hand and assessing it. Not a particularly good hand, but... Well, like most things in Ciri's life, it certainly could be worse. She lifts her gaze from her cards to Yennefer, although she doesn't put all that much effort in trying to read her for her thoughts on her hand. She doesn't think a woman who has lived as long as Yennefer and spent as much time in court would ever allow herself an easy tell.

"No cheating and reading my mind, by the way." Before the possibility of offense, playful or otherwise, could be taken at the accusation, Ciri grins. "Jaskier did warn me about that."

And Ciri knows it's just an excuse the bard would employ if he lost not because there was merit to the accusation or that Jaskier himself even really believed it. Hence the grin.

Lying won't rebuild trust between them, even beautiful lies, and Yennefer respects Ciri too much to feed her pretty lies. In honesty she's not sure if a normal life will ever be in Ciri's cards anymore than it was in her or Geralt's, but she hopes they can at least give her a loving one. A sometimes happy one. And Jaskier is a part of that. He is part of this family too, even if he can't always be with them.

Yennefer's hand is decent but to say she has a good poker face would be an understatement. She does not give anything away as she goes over her options in her head. Aretuza did not just teach her magic, after all.

Yennefer snorts a little. "I don't need to cheat to beat him at cards." It's said as a loving jab. Not to say she's never read minds to give herself an advantage -- she'd be lying to say she's above it when it's been advantageous to her, but she won't do it to Ciri.

Ciri's smile widens just a bit further at Yennefer's remark about her games with the bard. She imagines whatever Jaskier might be up to in Oxenfurt, he felt that jab just now and likely feels a sudden urge to sulk over an insult he didn't actually hear for himself. She doesn't say anything in return though, her gaze looking down to her own hand. Ciri's heart sinks a little as she realizes she doesn't have a particularly starting hand, but she's careful not to let the disappointment show too much on her face, busying and distracting herself as she arranges her hand. Once as satisfied as she can possibly be with her hand, Ciri lifts her gaze to look at Yennefer expectantly for her to start the game since Ciri was the one to deal.

Yennefer places the first card down, a modest play as she doesn't want to give away her hand just yet. Just because she loves Ciri doesn't mean she'll go easy on her, that's not her style. And she doesn't think Ciri wants that anyways. She wants to be treated like an equal. That's not always possible, but when it comes to card games?

That can be arranged.

Much as Ciri tends to be in combat and with magic, she's not particularly patient when it comes to making her own move. Rather than giving it a moment to try and think of what Yennefer might do next, she's quick to play her own card. It's the not the best of her mediocre starting hand, but she's hoping the confidence with which she placed it might give that illusion. She doesn't anticipate mercy from Yennefer and doesn't even think she can realistically outsmart her. But perhaps she might. If she can seem as though she's only tasted victory because Jaskier doesn't always play as aggressively as he could maybe she can throw Yennefer off enough to pull out a victory.

That's the hope, at least.

Yennefer does not plan on showing Ciri mercy, that may be what Jaskier does but it's not her love language. The girl will need to learn to rise to challenges anyways, not just in cards. She looks over her hand and calmly places her next card down, like it's no big deal.

Yennefer Open Post

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject